Among the most critical aspects in learning to deal with difficult or confronting situations with patients is the old axiom that says, "it's not what you say but how you say it that counts."   93% of communication is non-verbal.  While it is important to remember mom's admonition to "watch what you say," it is even more important to monitor your tone and body language when speaking.  Words comprise only 7% of the message; 38% of the message is auditory (volume, rate of speech, intonation and inflection, even accent); while 55% of the message is derived from visual aspects (facial expressions, body language, even what you are wearing or the environment you are in.)  If what you say doesn't match up with how you sound or how you look when you speak, the person will think you are, at best, insincere. (For example, if someone were apologizing to you for some situation, and was laughing while speaking, you wouldn't believe the apology was sincere.) 

Technology has infiltrated the orthodontic industry at amazing rates throughout the past 10 years. Although technology continues to be in the forefront of our practice goals, it is important to remember that it is not the bells and whistles of technology that will bring or keep patients in your practice.Implementing technology to your practice can enhance the overall practice image, streamline your daily protocols, as well as enhance your patient/parent communications. It is critical to remember the importance of balancing technology with consistent and sincere personal interaction with your patients and parents.

We value relationships in terms of how they serve to nurture and sustain us in our personal goals and value systems. Being self-righteous in our actions and opinions not only thwarts our relationship with others, but also ends up being self-destructive.

by Joan Garbo

The foundation for cooperative actions among people is a strong sense of relationship. The right “personality fit” usually makes this easy. But not everyone on a team, particularly large teams, always “fits” with each other. Our personality and communication styles often interfere with our feeling accepted and feeling held in high regard. As an example, some people have a communication style in which they are very direct in addressing issues and may not be focused on the listeners’ feelings. This style can be considered offensive by those who have a very indirect or subtle style of communicating, and are highly concerned with people’s feelings. When one examines the situation closely, it becomes clear that the “direct” person does not intend to offend. Conversely, when the “subtle” communicator speaks, he or she can be thought of as wimpy or indecisive or confusing, when in fact that person is focused on something that the listener is not. Neither way is good or bad, right or wrong. It is simply what is so. The important question to ask is, “How can we make this work for everyone?”